Big Nate: JARVIS LET ME GO

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Middle School. One of the banes of life that everyone has faced. It is a horrible occurrence for the average child. The child gets thrusted into a dangerous world where just saying something makes you banned on GoComics.com. Of course I'm overexaggerating, but people say the n word all the time there so it's not too different from the real world.

And that, my friends, is where our story begins.

Nate Wright  was your average middle schooler. He had big dreams, like being a millionaire cartoonist (no cartoonists can ever be a millionaire, except maybe those “superhero artists”) and be invited to playboy (Nate you're a middle schooler). But currently, he’s stuck in a locker because he told an eighth grader beating the crap out of his best friend Rodrick Heffely.

Bad day amirite?

Now, when Nate is in these situations, what will he do? Well, there's three options.


 * Option 1: Tell his Father… or a teacher.

Reasons why it won’t work:

His father is a depressed single man raising two kids in the most empty, most boring state in the world… Maine. Also, like every other adult in Nate’s life, he would just say: “Oh, kiddo, people like this exist, and that’s why you should forgive and respect AND, most importantly of all… befriend them!” The last (-and only!) time Nate tried this was in fifth grade, and that was what he got.

Plus, the teachers, well… weren’t the best. First of all we had Mr.Rosa, he worked at an Ice cream shop during the summer, so that tells you everything about him. Second option, we had Mr.Galvin. Yeah, no, he was as old as the hellscape that was the Hadean Eon. But the last, and worst option was Mrs.Godfrey. A teacher that WAS the Hadean Eon. Truly the worst of the bunch. She was the social studies teacher, and Nate… he despised her, along with Godfreys Favorite “Student” Gina. To know her, she was the devil.


 * Option 2: Draw Comics.

And, that, my friends, is the option he always chooses. Thankfully, thanks to cartoon logic, he can stuff a binder into his… pockets! There, he has everything he needs. Markers? Check. Pencils? Check. Paper. Check! A minifigure of MrLongDo? Check as well. There, he can draw whatever he needs to his heart's content. And then the door opens.

Frick.

Nate checked his watch. It was 1:15.

Double Frick.

Holy Crap, Nate thought. Imagine if someone like Gina was searching for him, imagine how horrible that could be. Gina could - no - WOULD report it to Mrs.Godfrey.

Oh Jesus Nate thought. Who could it be?

The locker door opened… It was Uncle Ted!?

“Uncle Ted, what are you doing here?” Asked Nate.

“Nate, I spend my time in my mothers basement, what do you think im doing in here?” He said.

“Wanna get married?” Said Nate.

“Sure!” Said Uncle Ted.

And that, kiddos, is how you're adopted.