Fanon:The Wiki Undone

After Thomas died...
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"Where the hell am I?"

Thomas looked around. He saw he was in the clouds. There was a gate to heaven. Standing right there was... a guy with a beard. Thomas walked over to him.

"Oh, hey, welcome to heaven. Tell me your name and we'll get you situated."

"Thomas."

"Son, there are a hella lot of Thomases. Which Thomas are you?"

"Um, Thomas Reeves Jr."

The guy opened a portal into some secret government files. He pulled out one that had Thomas's life in it. The guy read it. First he had a confused look, then disgusted. He put down the file.

"Um, we can't really let you in since you sexually harassed someone. Someone called... Wooden? Oh, and you committed numerous internet crimes as well as killing millions of autistic people and eradicated their existence."

"I SAVED THE WORLD THAT TIME!!!!"

"A war crime's a war crime, sonny. How about you check in with Hell over there, he'll help you out."

Thomas looked back. He saw a portal leading to hell. He walked inside and saw a demon at the gate.

"Oh, you're the guy who heaven rejected. The heaven guy called me. Lemme see your files." The demon read them and let out a disgusted laugh.

"This is very incriminating, but I'm afraid we can't let you in here. Lemme go chat with the heaven guy."

The two walked over to heaven. "What are you guys doing here?!" the heaven guy exclaimed.

"I came here to talk about Thomas here," the demon said.

The heaven guy and demon got closer together as Thomas stepped back. They took a look at the files, talked together, and eventually got into a full-blown fight. Heaven then calmed down the demon and they talked together some more. Then the two approached Thomas.

"We've decided to work out a deal," the heaven guy said. "We'll give you one last chance at life, as long as you can avenge your killer. Then, when you die eventually, we'll decide where you go."

"Alright, what are you waiting for? Send me back!"