Community Activity:The Room: Summer 2020 Edition

The Room: Summer 2020 Edition
'''ItsP-dog has landed. He brought fresh nitrogen'''

Iwshtfau Has Brought His Ego 

Iwshtfau: Yes I have brought my all-powerful ego! You will now cower in fear!!!

P-dog: *cowers in fear* (poor pp boy)

GC22: gimme an oreo

ZachOWott joined 

Zach: hi

GiantNate91 joins

GiantNate91: I’m tempted to kick P-Dog.

EddieAndReady joins

'''Eddie pulls out a piece of paper and writes the words "KICK ME" on it. He tapes it to P-Dog's butt. He kicks P-dog.'''

P-dog: Ouch!

GiantNate91 proceeds to do the same to Eddie.

moon man has clo- landed

moon man: guys i got us some vbucks we can stick up our asses

GiantNate91: Woah, language.

GarfieldMN: I dare someone to call “867-5309”

P-dog: Nah

TheYounglings crosses out the words "KICK ME" on P-Dog's back, and replaces it with "Send me to the nearest orphanage" P-dog: ;-;

Iwshtfau: :P

Iwshtfau Crosses Out The Words “Send me to the nearest orphanage” And Puts “Steal My Oreos”

P-dog: ;-;

just nate crosses out that and writes demote me on pdog

Zach opens a portal to the original game (look back at it) 

just nate walks through the portal

Iwshtfau Closes The Portal When JustNate Isn’t Fully In So It Sears His Arm Off

it was a hologram of him the whole time

P-dog walks through the portal after opening it again

Iwshtfau Does The Same Thing As P-dog Screams In Agony

turns out P-dog was already fully through the portal

Meanwhile, GiantNate91 has already gone through the portal.

P-dog: what how GarfieldMN sanitizes the portal before walking in P-dog rolles his eyes: what a clean freak Iwshtfau watches this: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-SijPVVeNdKY

just nate why you bully me

moon man: shiz i forgot to be here, anyway it looks like i should enter this portal

moon man jumps in

moon man: Y E E T

moon man: where we landing bois

Iwshtfau jumps through the portal as fast as light and makes sure nobody closes the portal '''Iwshtfau jumped through. But he found everyone holding sword. everyone cut off his arms'''

Turns out Iwshtfau had gone through a different portal

Turns out he was still cut

Turns Out He Wasn’t Cut And You Need To Shut Up

moon man: woah, where are we?

(zach this is your cue)

Iwshtfau: Yes where the hell are we

moon man audibly coughs

moon man: i SAID: where the fuck are we zach save us plz)

Edd: Yeah.

P-dog: -_-.

TheYounglings: Woah it's the Roman Coliseum

TheYounglings is suddenly pierced in the stomach by a Roman warrior, then drops down dead

GiantNate91 has gone back through the portal.

GN91: Ahhh, Romans are fascinating.

P-dog: I love how they conquered all of europe.

GN91: Well, after they conquered most, they immediately started falling apart.

TheYounglings: Ouch

GN91: That’s what you’re about to say when- WATCH OUT! P-dog: I DON'T SEE ANYTHING

Iwshtfau opens a portal to the future, then hops through it P-dog closes the portal, slicing Iwshtfau in half

Iwshtfau: no he doesn’t I’m already in.

Iwshtfau: you guys should come and see this! There’s flying peoples!

P-dog: lies

TheYounglings: Ouch

moon man motions his hands up as clones rise from the ground, with swords so they can kill the romans

moon man gives p-dog gloves that shoot fire.

moon man: frick, they're gonna get backup

moon man: tell me if you need any weapons

TheYounglings: I don't need one. I'll just slash people with my sword while it is still impaling me.

Iwshtfau is back from the future

'''He instantly kills 2 Romans by impaling them with a super-futuristic weapon he got from the future. (No duh I got it from the future).'''

Iwshtfau: Whats up?

'''TheYounglings hugs Iwshtfau, impaling him. '''

'''ZachOWott is back after forgetting about this. '''

'''ZachOWott is also offended that P-dog thought the Romans conquered all of Europe, when, in fact, they conquered the Mediterranean. 🚨Latin Student Alert'''🚨

P-dog is annoyed

Iwshtfau is annoyed

your mom is annoyed

moon man: okay you want a sword? here's a sword that can shoot bullets AND slice.

moon man gives theyounglings a super sword

TheYounglings refuses to use that sword

GiantNate91 suddenly tackles Younglings.

TheYounglings hugs GiantNate91, puncturing his lungs

P-dog: GaY

Zach: of course p-dog would say that *eyeroll*

P-dog: *insert lenny face here*

Swasimcool Joins

jn what is happening

Swasimcool: idk

Suddenly Roman warriors run out and start attacking everyone.

EddieAndReady gets hit by their swords.

ToPhu Appears

ToPhu: Moon man, you hurt me last time so take this.

ToPhu shoots Moon man's legs, crippling him

Swasimcool: Oh no!

TheYounglings body slams Moon Man, destroying his vital organs

Swasimcool: rip

moon man: what the fuck!

moon man cuts theyoungling's hands, making him drop the weapon

moon man: that's what you fokin get.

moon man transfers his consciousness to a clone.

moon man: you can't hurt me, if i die, i transfer myself into a clone.

moon man's clones surround theyounglings

moon man: i'll give you one chance

moon man's clones super glue theyounglings hands back on.

moon man: as for you?

moon man cuts tophu's hands, making him unable to use his hands

moon man: you aren't keeping those.

moon man opens a portal that takes him back to the original room and pushes tophu in.

moon man: it's your fault

moon man closes the portal.

moon man: he's safe, now can people stop attacking me for one GOD F*cking second?!?

TheYounglings: I don't need hands to use my sword

P-dog: pulls out a mythic scar and kills moon man and the rest of his clone and then he feeds moon man's soul to the younglings

Iwshtfau kills all the Roman warriors with his futuristic sword

TheYounglings eats his soul, the final remains of his existence scattered around his digestive system 

'''Zach hides behind a large pile of oreos. '''

TheYounglings hides behind a pile of Double Stuf Oreos.

TheYounglings: My pile is superior

Iwshtfau hides behind a pile of whomst'd've'ly'yaint'nt'ed'ies's'y'es'nt'ed'ies's'y'es Oreos

Iwshtfau: Beat that!

'''Zach eats his stack of oreos. '''

Swasimcool: nice

Zach: yum

TheYounglings: Aw, me oreos are gone.

moon man's consciousness transfers to another clone

moon man: okay f*ck this.

moon man walks a few feet off, makes a portal and jumps in

moon man: you'll thank me later. 

GiantNate91: dOn’T LeAvE mE

GiantNate91 also jumps in the portal

P-dog: gAy

moon man *shouting as the portal closes*: eat dirt.

moon man enters the {redacted} and looks for {redacted}

moon man tells ginatnate to get the {redacted} from the {redacted}

moon man calls p-dog while he waits for giant nate

P-dog is tired and goes to sleep Zach answere instead 

Zach: Hi. P-dog fell asleep after eating more oreos that we found, so I stole his phone

In ToPhu's Portal

ToPhu: Argh it hurts... Looks like Moon Man's strength is weakened every time he makes a clone, that push was even worse than his own IQ, meaning that Every Clone is weaker than the previous, so Moon Man is essentially significantly weaker than even when he had his legs broken.

'''ToPhu has earth-bending powers, he creates an aluminum hand to replace his previous one. ToPhu opens the portal to Moon Man's world and enters.'''

ToPhu: If you have no clones left, you won't be able to transfer your consciousness.

ToPhu creates humanoid structures made out of mud, which starts attacking Moon Man and his clones

ToPhu: Argh, they are not as strong as I hoped, nevertheless, you're done for.

ToPhu raises a piece of earth below him and flies away.

HappyTheApple joins

HappyTheApple: Hi

moon man shoots the flying dirt tophu is on with the literal hand grenade, moon man also makes a portal under tophu to send him back to everyone else's world, moon man then locks the word unallowing anyone to enter until unlocked.

moon man: so hey zach, just trying to fend off the mother frickers who keep following me to kill me, anyway im now getting {redacted} and power suites which makes my clones the same strength no matter how many i spawn in, how about you?

Iwshtfau: ...

Iwshtfau summons 1000 King Kongs to kill all the moon man clones

'''Turns out that Moon man shot a decoy ToPhu, and since IWSHTFAU's King Kongs obliterated everything, including Moon Man's clones and ToPhu's Mud Soldiers, ToPhu gained his powers back, while Moon man remains as weak as ever. ToPhu is no where to be seen.'''

we all find out that IWSHTFAU is very dumb, as me and my clones arein another universe, idiot.

'''i am also no longer weak and you didn't get your powers. idiot.'''

'''you tried to change my actions. idiot.'''

moon man: gotcha, i can now equip this, and BAM

moon man equips the power enhancer 

moon man gets the {redacted}

moon man sends an image to everyone with a middle finger.

Eddie pulls out his lazer bazooka and starts shooting IWSHTFAU and his King Kong's.

He creates another portal so that they can't kill him.

HappyTheApple: Hi

'''ToPhu steals and destroys the {redacted} from Moon Man. He then sends everyone back to the main world.'''

'''TURNS OUT TOPHU DOESN'T DO THAT CAUSE GUESS WHAT?!?!? YOU ARE NOT IN MY WORLD! WOWOWO? WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT?? '''

STOP. ALL OF YOU. STOP CONTROLLING MY ACTIONS. STOP FORGETTING THAT I AM NOT WITH YOU

moon man STILL has the {redacted}, keep trying to steal it and i will shove it up my ass.

moon man comes back to the low iq gang and shows off the oreos.

moon man: if you can't join them, bribe them with an infinite oreo box.

moon man opens the oreo box for all to see, removing an oreo causes another one to spawn instantly.

moon man: eat up, cause we're gonna go rescue giant nate, some huge flying thing took him and opened a portal to literal hell, we're gonna gear up, eat some oreos then go rescue him.

ToPhu: Says the one not telling people to control people. We know perfectly well that the last time GN91 was seen, it was in that world of yours.

Iwshtfau smites Eddie from the face of the earth

P-dog is back

'''Eddie was in another portal at the time so he didn't kill him. He hops out of his portal.''

Eddie: This story is getting really confusing. I have no idea where most people are since they went into the portals.

moon man: so what? he was the one who entered in his own will. if i was planning on killing him i would have lured him in. you don't want any oreos (and the story to freaking develop)?

moon man eats enough oreos for him to die, which he did.

moon man's consciousness transferred into one of his clones

moon man: i... neeed..... oreooo!

moon man: nevermind, just eat up already.

moon man is ready.

Pig Lover has joined.

Pig Lover: Who wants to team-up to destroy ToPhu?

Eddie: Why not?

Eddie gives Pig Lover his lazer gun to destroy ToPhu.

swasimcool: woah

P-dog: what has happened

Zach: ^ yeah, anything interesting?

Happy: Hi

Eddie: Pig Lover is getting a gun.

P-dog: That aint good

moon man: hey PL i'd rather be with you than tophu so....

moon man notices something....

MOON MAN (ANGERY): WHY IS NOBODY EATING THE OREOS IS TOOK ME 2 DAYS TO GET THEM wtf

ToPhu: They're mouldy. Shut up, I'm Canadian.

moon man: dude, they are infinite, if they are mouldy throw it out and another new fresh one will pop into the box.

P-dog stores the oreo box in his safe for later

mistytrainz joins

Mistytrainz: hello can i have some oreos sir i havent eaten in 10 days and theres a mega stuffed oreo up my ass

P-dog: Oh that sounds pretty bad here have some

just nate: steals them haha

Sorcerersilas summons the oreo demon and commands it to steal everyone's oreos and give it to him

Sorcerersilas: mwahahaha i love the dark oreo arts

just nate eats them all before he an take them

Sorcerersilas curses just nate to suffer oreo death.

just nate: screams noooooooooooooooooooo.....

Sorcerersilas buries just nate and dances on his grave.

just nate jumped out of the ground he was a zombie

Sorcerersilas uses a reverse undead spell to bring just nate to normal

moon man: Are you brain dead? these are LITERALLY INFINITE OREOS!

moon man: i like the fact that no matter what happens we still end up fighting

moon man really needs to pee its been like 16 days since the room started and he REALLY needs to pee

moon man: that's it i can't take it anymore

moon man pees behind a tree

moon man: Don't come here!

'''Sorcerersilas buys a rifle. '''

Sorcerersilas: Might need it for later ya know

P-dog buys a LMG

Sorcerersilas buys an LMG and coats the bullets with poison (he bought that too), as he loads it.

Then he starts shooting p-dog.

'''turns out P-dog is immune to poison and cannot be hurt by anything. He shoots sorcerersilas in the head and kills him'''

'''Silas casts a spell to make his spirit survive as he dies. he moves into just nate's body.'''

Just Silas (Sorcerersilas in just nate's body): You're gonna go to oreo hell for making that overpowered move. also this ain't overpowered because i have an oreo spellbook of dark magic, so i can cast spells to get me out of situations

moon man (still taking a piss): this is life

moon man starts moaning 

moon man moans even more.

you hear sipping sounds from behind the tree

the moaning continues

the moaning won't stop

it continues and continues and continues

moaning is echoing through your ears until...

you hear a piercing scream

reality around you is crumbling...

you begin to feel weird

its all too much for everyone

you all fall

Ǒ̸̧̼̳̹̒́͛͗̓̚͝r̵̫̈̃̒͊̃́̓̓͛ė̷̢̛̤̟̜̫̦͍́̈́̏̀̚ǫ̵̛̮̱̭̺̞̠̠̪͓͗̋̉̽̔̃͠ ̵̯̫͈̔g̷͇͈̗͘͜ơ̷̼͙̲̞̎̌̈́̾͌͒͑̉͆d̶̢̬̗͖̥̼͂ ̷̟̦̻̠͔̫̺͛̄̓̀̒͆̾̚͝h̸̟̰͚͍̞͈̦̥͇̺̉̾̃ǎ̶̡̫͔̥͙̟̹͈̾̔̉͐͑͒̀̚s̶̟͉͚̳̗̘͎̘̝̊̋ ̸̡̖̦͚̪̦͎͛̑̎̓̽͘j̶̗̖̬̬̿͗̑́o̸̹͓͇̞͙̘̗̪̐̉̓͛̕͝͠i̵̢̟̩̙̫͙̭̾͊̅́̕n̶͍̺͝e̵̥͎͐́͆̈́̅̀͌͌̕͠d̵̨͓̬̺̟̯̱͚̄́̊͋̑̈́͛͝

reality has turned into oreo heaven

'''the oreo god is ready to judge you for all your actions, do not fight, do not move. the oreo god will call each of you so he can judge you.'''

OREO GOD: ZACH, COME FORWARD PLEASE. YOUR FATE IS READY.

(guys please don't ruin this. you can say things to each other just please don't ruin it. the oreo god will legit judge you so don't do anything too much. don't try to be "different" and just take it. i will give turns for the oreo god to judge, you will all be judged)

P-dog: ZACH GO FOWARD

Eddie: sigh Really? This is what we're doing? Fine. We'll be here for a while, so I might as well settle down.

Eddie pulls out his 3DS and starts playing Pokèmon Diamond.

Silas pulls out a PC and starts playing Undertale.

just nate lands with an alt

Zach walks forward

Zach: Hi Mr. Oreo

Sorcerersilas: FINALLY. What took you so long zach?

'''ToPhu took an oreo from the"infinite" oreo box. It was empty. Looks like Moon Man was too stupid and arrogant to mistaken a large box for an infinite box. '''

OREO GOD: Oh hello there, Zachary. It is time to be judged for all of your actions in the room. In THIS room of course.

oreo god pauses

OREO GOD: From what i have seen from you, i can see that you tried to make the room more entertaining. Although others got a little pushy. Started fighting, even. However YOU have not hurt anyone and on the most part kept things civil. You stayed at your own, i respect that.

OREO GOD: and for that, you can go to Oreo heaven, enjoy.

puts zach in oreo heaven where anything you think of becomes possible, but the only food is oreos and there are rivers of all kinds of oreos.

OREO GOD: let's hope you are all as fortunate as zach

OREO GOD CALLS FOR SILIAS TO COME FORWARD.

Silas: Y-y-yes?

OREO GOD: from what i have seen, it seems that you have mastered the dark oreo arts and you seem to really care about oreos. You did attack some people and you were sometimes irresponsible, which makes it hard to pick.

OREO GOD: If you answer this question i will let you into oreo heaven.

OREO GOD: the question is: WHO IS JOE!

Silas: Umm...umm... Joe Moraliste?

OREO GOD IS ANGRY

oreo god: no it's joe mama you uncultured swine.

oreo god pulls a lever and takes sorcer to oreo hell.

oreo god: i might ask another question later and if you answer it right ill take you to oreo heaven. but now.

OREO GOD CALLS FOR P-DOG  BE JUDGED

P-dog walks up: henlo oreo

OREO GOD: so it seems that you have fresh nitrogen, which indicates that you are smart. You were tortured at the beginning of the room, poor creature. you didn't do that many bad things and in the previous room you started the oreo fad. I respect that alot, you are why i am here which means that you get....

OREO HEAVEN.

OREO GOD: yeet.

OREO GOD takes p-dog to oreo heaven.

OREO GOD CALLS FOR TOPHU TO BE JUDGED.

OREO GOD SHOUTS FOR TOPHU TO BE JUDGED

Eddie: I don't think ToPhu is coming... Can you do someone else?

P-dog: HOOOOOOOO *starts singing russian national anthem* AY IM IN HEAVEN

OREO GOD: LAST CHANCE OR HELL YOU GO

just nate: Tophu is banned so do someone else please

OREO GOD CALLS FOR EDDIE TO BE JUDGED

LAST CHANCE FOR EDDIE Eddie: Yo.

Ed: HelLO?!

OREO GOD: stfu

oreo god pulls a lever that drops you to hell, which is filled with cream rolls instead of oreos

OREO GOD TAKES TOPHU TO HELL TOO

OREO GOD CALLS FOR ANYONE WHO IS NOT JUDGED

Silas: (in hell) welcome to oreo hell.

OREO GOD CALLS FOR JUST NATE TO BE JUDGED

just nate! Yes.?

Eddie: :(

ToPhu does not believe in any other religion other than the holy melons, therefore the Oreo God has no effect on ToPhu's bidding.

ToPhu: I'm gonna try to hack into the Room's console.

OREO GOD groans

Oreo god to everyone in heaven: once again tophu is trying to take control of the situation simply because he doesn't like it, but that's how he is.

Oreo god: i'm guessing he's going to use the "panel" to be the hero but oh well at least i can judge one last person now.

OREO GOD PICKS UP TOPHU AND TAKES HIM TO OREO HELL AGAIN AND LOCKS THE GATES, it doesn't matter if you don't believe in him but he still exists.

oreo god: justnate you can go to oreo heaven

oreo god takes tophu to oreo hell.

scottish spacepuppy joins

scottish spacepuppy: what is happining here

Silas: well, now that were in hell, what should we do?

scottish spacepuppy: excuse me?

just nate: lets go

Silas: don't worry i'm in an entirely different dimension than you just ignore everything i'm saying

oreo god: no stfu you're in hell.

Silas: I KNOW I'M IN HELL OK BITCH THAT'S WHAT I MEANT BY A DIFFERENT DIMENSION

just nate: chill out

Silas: you're right... i need to calm down... while i'm trapped in a realm of torture for all eternity...

Silas starts meditating.

Happy: Hi

OREO GOD: you know what? screw the rules, everyone can go to heaven.

OREO GOD PICKS ANYONE NOT IN HEAVEN AND PUTS THEM IN HEAVEN EXCEPT FOR TOPHU FOR HE HAS SINNED TOO MUCH.

Oreo god: enjoy, i'm going to go. I will also come back when this story lacks plot so i can save the day.

just nate: what’s up guys

Silas: Thank you! now i don't have to resurrect dead memes and make an army of them to overthrow you.

'''N/A stares at his huge... bulging... long... beefy... juicy... hot dog! (You dirty minded shit.)'''

Tophu easily escapes hell

ToPhu: That was pathetic. Eh, still harder than fighting Moon Man.

'''Console: Deleting Oreos... beep... 13% Completion'''

ToPhu: The process begins!

'''Console: Deleting Oreos... beep... 15% Completion'''

N/A secretly hacks the console to swap the Oreos with hot dogs instead of deleting Oreos.

'''Console: Morphing Oreos... beep... 21% Completion'''

Silas: do you mind if i add a bit of code

Silas goes to N/A's computer and adds a function called 'Hotdogbomb" that makes the nearest oreo-to-hotdog explode largely when "detonate bomb" is said.

'''Console: Morphing Oreos... beep... 25% Completion'''

The Oreo God, now the Hot Dog god was part of the 25%, 

ToPhu: detonate bomb!

The Oreo God along with other oreos (now hot dogs) explodes.

Silas: fool, there was a problem with what you did. the function doesn't work until 100 percent. I'm guessing the explosion was the computer's reaction. Also Oreo God is a god, so, by simple logic, he's not dead. (note: before anyone says this is overpowered, i actually was thinking of a scenario where the function is used before 100%. far from the scenario I thought of, but now that it happened i guess i'll just have to with this.-Silas)

Silas casts a spell that eternally binds Tophu to Oreo Hell, and steals his console before that.

Silas: well, now that that's done, what do you wanna do?

'''ToPhu easily escapes Oreo Hell again, and the console can't be stolen or hacked thanks to NordVPN. ToPhu deletes Silas's code and locks the Room's Console with 7 different passwords and keys. '''

'''Console: Morphing Oreos... beep... 32% Completion'''

scottish spacepuppy: I have no idea what’s happing so, I’m just gonna go over the the room v2 and do my thing

oreo god comes back

oreo god: this is pretty amusing

oreo god pulls out some popcorn 

oreo god: oh and tophu stfu i'm a god, you can't kill me.

oreo god: what next? are you going to keep trying to kill me or what, at this point you have done nothing but attack me.

oreo god: anyhoo i'm going to watch.

Silas: alright i have no idea how tf you got out. the binding spell is supposed to stop you from being able to make you not be able to get out, ever. As in, psychically impossible to enter out of oreo hell. So i guess i'll have to do... OREO BINDING SPELL 2.0!

'''Silas casts a spell that makes Tophu like a magnet to oreo hell. his feet are stuck to the ground of oreo hell.'''

Oh, and Silas crushes Tophu's console.

Silas: Ok! Now what should we do?

'''Console: Morphing Oreos... beep... 50% Completion'''

'''ToPhu accesses the console and deletes religion. ToPhu is back in the moral universe.'''

Eddie starts eating popcorn and watches.

Since that humans had to use religion as a moral armchair, the world is now in dystopia.

Silas: (sarcastic) Great job, Tophu. Great job.

'''Console: Morphing Oreos... beep... 69% Completion'''

ToPhu: Yeah, we're not in the human world. We're in a Room.

OREO GOD: lmao just cause you don't believe in me doesn't mean i don't exist.

oreo god eats more popcorn

oreo god: tophu stop trying to kill me, that's all you've done since you came.

Silas: technically, before the judging, we were at a graveyard, where i buried just nate. also, oreo god, in this world, no one believes in you, at all, because religion is deleted.

just nate: ah yes 69

ToPhu: Alright, I kill Moon Man instead.

'''Console: Deleting all Clones... beep... 99%'''

ToPhu: Since Moon Man's conscience is in a clone, he might get deleted.

'''Console: Morphing Oreos... beep... 75% Completion'''

'''Silas grabs the console and uses it to add religion to get them out this hellhole. Silas realizes he's a spirit right now, so enters the nearest dead body.'''

Installing Religion...beep...22% Completion

Installing Religion...beep...99% Completion

'''Console: Installing Religion complete. Please enter the password in order to initiate the installation.'''

ToPhu: I'll do it. Password's ÊÆ ©³ ½½

Console: Password Correct, Entity Religion Installed

'''Console: Morphing Oreos... beep... 90% Completion'''

Silas tried use a sword to kill ToPhu, then uses the console to take over the world.

'''Console: Error... beep... Access Denied... beep... Please enter 7 passcodes in order to access the Console.'''

'''Console: Morphing Oreos... beep... 100% Completion'''

Oreo god: I AM moon man, but i turned into oreo god when i fully embraced the oreo life.

Oreo god: My conscience is not a clone, simpleton. It can be cloned.

ToPhu: Doesn't matter now, every oreo that ever existed and will exist has and will be turned into Hot Dogs. Enjoy being the Hot Dog God now...

Console: Removed {Attribute[Entity:Moon_Man|Attribute:God]}

ToPhu: Oop. guess you can't even be a god. Enjoy bracing the mortal life again

'''Console: '24 Hour Lockdown' Mode Activated... beep... '''

OREO GOD: tophu, stop trying.

oreo god motions his hands and opens up his own console, cancelling all tophu's commands.

oreo god: jack off, i must.

oreo god: oops wait i can't right now, i will watch closely as tophu fails over and over again.

oreo god: it's kinda cute how hard tophu tries to hurt me. He tries so hard for me and only me.