Fanon:Big Nate: To Hawaii!/The Full Book

Chapter 1
Now, I don’t wanna brag or anything, but I feel like I’m the best person in the universe. I could possible be a celebrity, maybe even a super-star! Heck, I could even be the president! But I have to stay in middle school.

[Nate starts thinking “And oh, what a great place it is.”]

[Nate makes a comic.]

Nate Wright in…

MIDDLE SCHOOL NIGHTMARE!

FEATURING… MRS. GODZILLA!!!

Mrs. Godfrey: Good morning, class. Today I will show you the history of Benjamin Franklin.

Nate: [thinking] Oh, not this again.

20 MINUTES LATER…

Mrs. Godfrey: Nate, did you write down what I showed on the board?

Nate: Uh… [chuckle] I-I-I- I didn’t.

Mrs. Godfrey [turns into Mrs. Godzilla] WELL THEN DO IT NOW!!! [breathes fire]

[It then comes back to real life.]

Godfrey: Ahem.

Nate: Uh… and THAT is an example of very disrespectful and hurtful comics.

Godfrey: You didn’t do the work, but I’ll give you that.

PHEW! I should use this method more!

I then return home to see my dad on the couch.

”Hey Nate! You’ll never guess what happened!” he says.

Lemme guess, he got good Rogaine.

”Turn on the TV!” he says again.

I then see dad on the TV.

Nate: That’s you?

”Yes!” my dad says. “As a kid, I wanted to be on a game show. And my dream came true!”

By the way, if you want to know what the show is called, it’s Guess The Word.

Dad then calls Ellen to be down here

”I’m gonna be down in a sec, daddy!” Ellen says.

”Be quick though.” dad says.

Ellen then finishes up.

Game show host: Alright, whoever gets this right wins a special prize. It can treat high blood pressure in its oral form. When applied topically it can treat certain types of baldness.

”Oh, I hope you do it, dad!” I say.

Marty: Oh! What is… ROGAINE!

Game show host: That’s right!

How ironic. Anyway, we then all start cheering for Dad.

”Daddy! You did it!” Ellen cheers.

Marty: [thinking] And the kids will surely enjoy my prize.

Game show host: And your prize is…

”What is it?” Ellen and I say.

Game show host: A vacation to Hawaii!

Chapter 2
I kid you not, we’re going to Hawaii.

”Daddy!!!!” Ellen says.

So this fatso ended up with a TRIP TO HAWAII? Wow.

Dad says that we have to go to bed, but as I always do, I’ll draw comics.

Nate Wright’s Real Life Stories

So my dad went on this nationally syndicated game show called “Guess The Word”.

And then he, like the title, guessed the word.

Marty: Rogaine!

And we ended up getting a vacation to Hawaii. We will find out what will happen on the next episode of Nate Wright’s Real Life Stories!

Well, I’m turning myself in now.

THE NEXT DAY

Marty: Nate! Ellen! Wake up! Yippe-kai-yay! Chop chop!

We then have breakfast. Dad actually made good pancakes for breakfast today.

And then begins our 30 minute trip to the airport.

When we arrived, I found someone. He looked so familiar.

Nate: [thinking] Could it be? Is it…

Nate: Francis! What are you doing here?

“My parents won a trip to Hawaii on a game show” Francis says, coincidentally.

”Wow, my dad did too! Same airline, same area, same hotel!” I say.

When we go to the plane, my dad and Francis’ dad (which is called Tom Pope if you wanna know) sat together

Nate: Hey Francis, I have an idea.

Francis: What?

Nate: [whispering] So we start watching psst psst psst psst psst

We watched like 10 R-rated movies, listened to heavy metal, and played 18+ games on the screen. We started playing chess after a bit. I kept on beating Francis every round.

We stopped at Los Angeles and stayed there until tomorrow.

I won’t tell the whole story to you, but we finally made it to Hawaii.

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